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The Evil Geeks Top 5 Thunderdome Throwdown: Our Dads Can Beat Up Your Dads Edition

Happy Father’s Day Evil Geeks! Dad’s come in all shapes and sizes. Geek culture is certainly in no short supply of classic father figures, whether good, bad or ugly, we got ’em all. It’s been awhile since we’ve done a Top 5 list so we thought what better time to do one than Father’s day? Consider this our tribute to all the nerd father’s out there.

Biff

5.) Norman Osborn

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Genius, world class dick, criminally insane and a super villain, it would be difficult to keep Norman Osborn off this list. Well, Normy was never anyone’s notion of an ideal dad but he did pass his ridiculously strange hairline to his son Harry. Yes, Norman should have been a “better” dad, but in a very Hemingway-esque moment his wife died giving birth. That’s enough to resent your kid and lash out against him, right? It’s not, but I find Norman’s story to be an interesting one. If anything you can trace it back to his father, Ambrose the brilliant alcoholic who lost their family’s company and was down right abusive to them. Norman’s staying power within the Marvel U is no surprise, as he’s one of the most misunderstood, derided, twisted and fascinating characters. We just can’t seem to get enough of him.

If banging your son’s friend and spawning children, only to try kill her in a very public way (with Spidey inadvertently delivering the death blow) to cover up your secret and also traumatize your arch nemesis doesn’t scream dad of the year than I don’t know what does.

o1

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30 Days Hath Novembeard – Day 12

We promised more white beards, and man are we going to deliver. Perhaps the nerdiest old man beard on this list also goes to the shittiest dad, Henry Jones Sr.

I know, I know. It’s hard to be a single dad and care about your kid while spending your evenings researching possible resting places for the Holy Grail. Especially when that kid is constantly being brought home by the local police for his obsession with bringing archeological finds to the local museums. Henry Jones is a class act though. You can tell by the beard, perfectly trimmed and immaculate with a little salt and pepper. No doubt he’s the only person on our Novembeard list who both quotes Charlemagne and was shot by a Nazi. (Bonus Points for being Eskimo Brothers with his son Also, if it’s father and son does that change the terminology?).

Well thanks to his dad’s handy dandy grail notebook, Indy was able to save his life. He somehow forgot to include the chapter which tells us that in latin Jehovah is spelled with an “I”, but whatever.

Sean Connery also portrayed proverbial bad ass, James Bond. He may have been smooth as hell but Bond never had any whiskers so he gets knocked down a peg. Henry James Sr. is a crotchety old man whose only defense in the grip of danger is the ink from a pen.

Game.Set.Match.Nerd

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