Category Archives: Rants

The Rumour Come Out. Does Varus Riot is Gay??

Twas few nights before Christmas (25 to be clear)
When the dev peeps of Riot, made something quite dear
Through the vid to the comics, their message was clear
In the year which we live in, Varus was queer;

Well not quite, for you see, in his new shiny Lore
It is now clearly stated that he’s two people more
Kai and his Valmar, those be the gays
Who then merged with the Darkin, through mysterious ways

To be fair, we can’t know
Of the Darkin’s own heart
For perhaps he too also
Likes his men tall and smart

(Or at least)
(Those he won’t tear apart)

So rejoice on this day!
When a step forth was made
For the game and the people
Who have long since League played

We hold hope that in future
They’ll be adding more queer
But for now we’ll be merry
And sing gaily with cheer

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LGBTQ+ representation in games – League of Str8 Peeps – a rant

So here we are folks, another day another rant about Riot and League of Legends. This one is a real bucket-flipper people, for I am about to talk at length about Xayah and Rakan: the League’s latest and straightest champions to date.

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Female objectification in games -League of Sexism- a rant

{Warning: the author of this post is by no means slut-shaming and is perfectly fine with people wearing skimpy outfits if they so desire. However, as the characters mentioned below are designed by other people (with a nefarious agenda in mind) they do not have agency over their own clothing and haven’t been described as such. Again, not slut-shaming.}

If you’ve been around on the internet for the past few years, then you’ve probably come across a free-to-play, MOBA game called League of Legends. Chances are you’ve downloaded it and have stumbled upon the glistening mannequins it has opted for in place of female characters, proceeding to puke your eyes out from the horror of it all. Now, quick disclaimer to any Leaguers out there, your game is horribly and sickeningly sexist and no amount of denial/stunning ignorance can disguise that. It might not be the only one out there and there are worse offenders, but it’s a good place to start. Actually, the staggering level of sexism on display is not my only issue with the game, what with there being next to zero representation available –queer or otherwise- but I digress (seriously though, there’s like 3 (5, possibly 6) people of colour in it. What the hell Riot?) You see, in LoL female characters’ bodies do not let themselves be hindered by the restricting laws of physics and/or anatomy. In fact, those rebellious sacks of over-sexualized flesh do all that’s in their metaphysical power to go against the very fabric of reality; from painfully-narrow waists, inhumanly slender figures and unnatural swivel-spines to abnormally large breasts, contorted torsos and presumably boneless extremities, LoL captures exactly what’s wrong with how women are portrayed in the gaming industry. One of the many things this game does wrong is, as usual, the amount of armor any female character is allowed to wear. Case in point, let’s have a look at Morgana’s current splash art.

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Marvel’s Inability To Properly Trade Chris Claremont’s X-Men Run

I’ve ranted before about Marvel’s strange and erratic trade publishing methods and schedule, especially for older material. The newly minted Epic Collection is seemingly trying to correct that a bit and focus on publishing material that is either hard to come by or hasn’t ever been traded before.  Each volume associated with a character or team is numbered but not being put out in chronological order. So for instance (at the time of writing) Daredevil only has one volume published, which is 18. This covers the Fall From Grace storyline from the early 90’s. The X-Men have one volume of the Epic Collection released thus far and it’s Volume 1 which contains the first 23 issues of the 1960’s Stan Lee era.


So what’s my gripe?

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How Do You Solve A Problem Like Guardians?

I want to love Bendis’ Guardians of the Galaxy series. I really do. I generally enjoy Bendis’ writing and hell after the movie, who isn’t a fan of the Guardians? You may remember a while back I read the first three issues to familiarize myself with the characters. The story was good enough, but it didn’t leave me dying to read more. After I finished it my curiosity was quenched. I’ve followed the series on and off, but most recently was able to re-read everything and catch up to the latest issue (which at the time of this writing is #21).


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The Good, The Bad And The Ugly And The Problem With Extended Cuts

I had the privilege of seeing the seminal Western The Good, The Bad and The Ugly in a movie theatre not too long ago. As the movie began to play I realized the version we were watching was the extended cut. This was fine by me, as many times as I had seen the movie my old DVD copy predated it. As did the original way I use to watch it by renting two VHS tapes together from the local movie store because of its extensive running time.


This was a movie I hadn’t seen in a long time, I once thought of this as a masterpiece of the genre. While it is still an excellent movie, it always had problems with its pacing and length. The original Italian version of the movie (i.e. extended cut) was damn near 3 hours but was trimmed by 16 minutes to a total of 2 hours and 41 minutes for its international release which was the version everywhere outside of Italy had seen. When this footage was restored in 2002 Clint Eastwood and a very old Eli Wallach came back to overdub their lines (Lee Van Cleef sadly had already passed away).

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