The Vikings: Season 3 – Episodes 1+2


Lay your weapons beside me, and let me tell you a tale of glory and bloodshed….

Welcome back all of my fine Pagan brethren to another season of the Vikings. You may have noticed that I am combining the first two episodes into one review, as it has been a couple weeks of near blackout nights for your boy, Arthur. Anyways, if you have been keeping up with the series from the beginning, then you guys are all pretty much aware of what has been happening with Ragnar and our crew. If not, you may want to go peruse my write-ups of the last couple seasons. With that out of the way, let’s jump into it.

With Ragnar head-butting the fuck out of Horik last season and taking over as King, things have gotten pretty calm and collected in Kattegat. It was a shame to see Horik go last season, as he was a pretty solid character, however, the way he went was totally worth the loss. Ragnar has taken over and has been waiting patiently for warmer climates so he can head back to Wessex and see if he can get that land from King Ecbert. All of our favorites have returned, including Rollo, Lagertha, Bjorn and my main man Floki, and everyone is looking goddamn savage. I cannot begin to describe to you how right it feels seeing my brethren on screen once again.

bjorn and ragnar

There have been quite a few developments so far during the first two episodes. I am going to keep this as spoiler free as possible, just so you all can enjoy it at your leisure, but I cannot say that everything will be kept secret. Within the first two episodes, our Vikings have already set sail and spilled copious amounts of blood in the name of expansion and hopeful peace. Nothing like cutting someone’s dick off to let them know that you don’t want to fight anyone.

After reaching Wessex with almost the entire crew in tow, Ragnar meets with Ecbert and some terms are discussed. In order for Ragnar to have those lands, he must do something for the Princess, and if you guys remember her, she’s a goddamn lunatic. It surprises me that Ecbert even keeps her around, but I guess having her on your side is better than the opposite. We all have that one friend. Unfortunately, the men Ragnar has to kill happen to be the Princess’s uncle and brother, who supposedly raped her years ago. It’s sort of hard to tell if she is lying, but Ragnar wants land, and if he has to litter the field with corpses, he will have it.

viking buggy ride

I really need to take a step back real quick from the story and give some credit to the performances. Travis Fimmel is fucking killing it as Ragnar. I know I may have mentioned this before, but his subtle nuances to his character, like the slight cocking of the head and snake like neck movements really add a sense of menace to him, yet Ragnar himself is more often than not a man of order. Bjorn seems to have grown another thirty feet as Alexander Ludwig can’t seem to stop growing and looking like a goddamn mountain. As for Floki……he’s goddamn Floki and will forever be the best character on this show. Hands down. Rollo is certainly not as much of a pussy as he was last season, and you’ll come to find that out in a somewhat hysterical fashion. I know it may sound a bit ridiculous, but when you see it, you’ll know what I mean. We’ll just say Rollo doesn’t need to see a zombie bite someone just to murder the fuck out of their leg.

Comedy seems to have been given a more prominent role in this season, much to my enjoyment. There seem to have been more jokes and laugh worthy moments in the first two episodes of this season than in almost all of the other ones. The best part is that it’s Floki and Rollo bringing the laughs. Floki I can see it from, as you will too, but Rollo surprised me. All I can say is that bloodlust can make you feel like you are tripping balls, and it’s amazing. There’s also been quite a bit of focus on romance this season, which is fine with me as it can help move things along. Bjorn has his girl, Lagertha is single so she’s sort of having her own sort of fun, and Ragnar just keeps acquiring more kids. Dude just can’t stop popping out more sons. Things are definitely going to be getting interesting this season. I can guarantee you that some terrible yet amazing things are going to be happening.

viking jump

If any of you have ever read any of my articles or know me personally in real life, you know that I am a big fan of absolute brutality and terror, albeit only in fictional fashion. Episode two of this season has by far, one of the most brutal and terrifying images to ever grace my screen, and I shall tell you why. Last season, we got the crucifixion of Athelstan, which really rattled some people. I, personally, did not get offended by it, mainly because it was part of the story. Same can be said for the Blood Eagle episode. Personally, the demoralization of a man or many men all at once is more brutal and frightening than anything else. What could possibly cause so many men to run away in fear? Seeing all of their friends and brothers decapitated and hung up on the front of Ragnar’s ship while he sits and smiles on the bow of the ship. For fucking real. Imagine you are part of a defending force, and you see that image rolling over a fog covered river. You would shit your fucking pants, especially after these supposed “savages” just outsmarted your finest commanders and made you all look like bitches. That is the true terror of Ragnar. He cannot seem to make a wrong decision. But time catches up with us all.

I have absolutely nothing but high hopes for this season, and I am beyond excited to see what happens. We have so many compelling characters, and even one of my better friends, who literally hates almost everything, cannot find anything wrong with this show. I am amazed that someone was finally able to make something special and wonderful with my Viking brethren at the helm. Season 3 is shaping up to be amazing, and I cannot contain my excitement. Skold!!! For Ragnar! For Odin! And for Asgard!!

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About Arthur Harkness

I like things, and things like me back

Posted on March 3, 2015, in Reviews, TV and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

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