Villain Spotlight: Hook
Oh if it isn’t another Friday. Welcome back my fancy ass shipmates to another edition of the Villain Spotlight. Today I am bringing to you a pretty serious piece of my childhood, and something I am assuming you have all seen. If you have not, then we are most likely going to have some problems. Now most of you may know that I have a love for Disney things, and I also understand the irony of it considering I have a heart blacker than the inside of an asshole, but I do love me some Disney. The film in question, Hook, was a major part of my childhood, and repeated screenings and quote-offs were held between the family and I. One aspect though that I seemed to enjoy more so than most was how amazing Dustin Hoffman was as Hook, so in honor of said performance, I am dedicating the Villain Spotlight this week to him. Now let’s open this Boo-Box!!
Dustin Hoffman did for Captain Hook what Christopher Meloni did for cans of food; he made it amazing. Every one of his scenes is a show stealer, and the fact that he plays Hook with that sort of obvious but slight craziness that made him the menace of Neverland. It’s fascinating. Credit also needs to be given to Bob Hoskins for playing such an awesome Smee, but Hoffman was in charge of leading everything down a path of awesomeness.
Hook, for those of you who unfortunately may not know, is a reimagining of the Peter Pan tale wherein Peter becomes an adult after falling in love and leaving Neverland like some kind of fucking idiot. Why would you in your right mind, ever freaking leave that place? It looks so awesome! Hoffman plays Hook, who after stealing Peter’s kids, brings them back to Neverland in an attempt to get Pan back there as well to finally settle the score. Peter, not completely remembering his time there and not realizing he really is Peter Pan, goes there reluctantly to save his kids, and this is where I tuned out for the most part…..just kidding, but seriously. I don’t give a shit about your kids Pan, I care about you finally facing off against Hook in what could be one of the greatest battles ever, save for Spike vs. Vicious in Cowboy Bebop. And what a battle it is. Now before we get to that, we must understand that while Pan was away, we got Rufio leading the lost boys, who seems to do a pretty good job for the most part, and he also looks way more badass than Pan. Anyways, he gets merced towards the end and then Pan starts the fight for real. I gotta be honest, I never thought in my life that I would ever see Dustin Hoffman square off against Robin Williams in a sword fight, because I don’t think my body can handle that much hair and panache, but it happens, and its fucking amazing.
Hook, for all he’s worth, is slightly crazy, but he has his shit together when it is necessary. He understands Pan is just a shell of the person he once was towards the beginning, and he finds a way to still mess with him, and it is pretty brutal. How would one go after and utterly defeat someone who doesn’t want to fight you or deal with what you are throwing at him? take his kids, make them a smaller version of you, and then throw it in his face. Ooooooooh I’m getting goosebumps just thinking of that sort of villainy. He does this, and brainwashes Pan’s son into looking , speaking and thinking like Hook. Unfortunately, this gets undone and we are deprived of a sequel starring the kid, having him go crazy and take out the rest of the Lost Boys. This honestly should have been a trilogy. Kid gets kidnapped by Hook in first one, goes crazy and kills a bunch of the Lost Boys in the second, Pan finally gets through to him after the real Hook returns again and they fight him together in an all out war for redemption on both sides. I just gave you all the dark and gritty reboot you have been clamoring for…….Oscar pleeeeeeeeease. Hook, for all he is worth, puts his entire soul into the kid and was for the most part, a better father than Pan was, but what else can you expect when one guy hangs out with kids all day, and the other has an entire Pirate operation and port town to look after. One is definitely more responsible and in control, and that is Hook. Unfortunately, the world doesn’t run the way it should, and after the kid loses his brainwashing, he goes back to Pan. Hook, understandably is hurt, and it shows that even though he is a crazy one handed lunatic, he still has his heart….albeit black and barely beating, but still a heart.
Hoffman gave us a more adult and serious version of Hook, but he also gave us what the animated version would act and look like on screen. He blended the best parts of both worlds, and it came to a head in the most amazing way possible. He just looks so comical yet so sinister at the same time that it really throws you off. There is nothing worse than being intimidated by a guy who looks the way he does. It can honestly take you off guard and you will wind up in the Boo Box for fucking up in his presence. I love it. Speaking of which, we should all be so lucky to have a Boo Box in our possession. There has been many times in my life when I have felt the need to own a giant black box that I could fill with scorpions to punish those who have wronged me, but sadly, we live a world of rules, or as I like to call them, fun dampeners. It’s really unfortunate, but hey, whattaya gonna do?
I honestly shouldn’t even be having to recommend this to you all because you should all have seen this movie already. If not, then you are a criminal and a hooligan who needs to sit down and watch this…..like right fucking now. You will be amazed by Hoffman’s amazing portrayal of Hook and you will fall in love with that rapscallion with only one hand. Trust me.
Hook Hook wears a Hook!!
All images and characters depicted are copyright of their respective owners. Please click on the “About Us” tab for our takedown policy.