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Monthly Archives: August 2013

Dinosaurs Eat Man…Woman Inherits the Earth: Musings On Jurassic Park (Part 2)

Welcome back! To catch up on the first part of this article, you can check it out here. If you’re ready to move on get ready because we’ve spared no expense.

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Meanwhile back at the compound…

We find that Dr. Sadler was smart to abandon the group and has made it safely inside. It has become clear to Hammond, Muldoon and Mr. Arnold that Nedry’s reasons for shutting down the power are super sketch and that he will not be coming back. It’s here that we also learn that the magic word is not “Please”, as my parents had always told me. John Hammond pleads to Muldoon to go back to the now stand-still jeeps and bring his grandchildren back to safety (making no mention of his concerns about the safety of Grant or Malcolm). Muldoon and Sadler go off into the great unknown to bring everyone back. It is here that we are again reintroduced to Dennis Nedry, who has clearly never driven in the rain and unlike John Hammond, did not “spare no expense” on glasses that don’t fog up. He crashes into a post and loses his direction. He drives off a small cliff and becomes stranded. It’s here that we meet my Halloween costume dinosaur, Dilophosaurus. It’s immediately clear that Nedry has no idea what kind of crazy, mystical power this little dino can unleash. After he throws a stick at her and insults her intelligence, Dilophosaurus loses her temper. She flashes her fancy frills and spits her monster-goo at Nedry’s eyes and blinds him. We leave our dear Mr. Nedry as he is slowly and painfully being devoured by this cute little demon-beast.

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Let Me Put My Suggestions In You: The Trailer Park Boys

Warning: Heavy profanity to follow. If you are weak of heart or just don’t like swearing in general, you may want to steer clear of this one. Just letting you all know. ENJOY!

Oh my fuck do I have something special for you guys today. I was sitting around over the weekend debating on what to provide you guys for this week’s suggestions,  and was having quite a bit of difficulty. Not in the material department, but more in choosing which one would be best for you all. I racked my brain and tried to sit down and write something, but the words just weren’t coming. A long string of obscenities seemed to be the only thing that my brain was capable of producing at the time……and then it hit me. Fuck…..shit…..bitch…..Ricky….Julian….Bubbles…..I know what I must do (and those words are not respective towards each person). Ladies and gentlemen, for your pleasure and the pleasure of all of your girlfriends, I am proud to bring you the Trailer Park Boys.

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Dinosaurs Eat Man…Woman Inherits the Earth: Musings On Jurassic Park (Part 1)

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For those of you that know me, it comes as no surprise to you that I have a tendency to become obsessed with things. My first real obsession came about in 1993. I was 8 years old and that obsession was Jurassic Park. I was already pretty heavily obsessed with dinosaurs at this point, so when I saw the posters and trailers for the movie, I begged my parents to let me see it. It was the first PG-13 movie that I saw in the movie theater (and probably the first PG-13 movie that I had ever seen in general).  After leaving the theater, I promptly begged my mother to take me to the local toy store so I could fill my room with Jurassic Park themed goodies. Over the next few months I spent any money that I had on acquiring more JP items. I had bed sheets, the tent, several T-shirts, pajamas (apparently they only made JP pajamas for boys, naturally curious, I questioned my mom as to why there was a hole in the crotch and that was how I learned that boys pee standing up), I even dressed up as a Dilophasaurus for Halloween that year. Then there’s my most prized possession of all of my JP merch, an item which I still own to this very day, The Jurassic Park Compound. This movie is still in my top 5 all time favorite movies. I love everything about it, the fact that the dinosaurs are robots and costumes and not CGI, the musical score (John Williams is a GENIUS), the cast, everything. That’s not to say that this movie isn’t without its faults. I recently decided to watch this movie and jot down my thoughts as I watched. This was supposed to be a short review but it turned into a play by play plot synopsis, with a smattering of my own thoughts mixed in.

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Evil Movie Reviews: The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

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Welcome back for another edition of Evil Movie Reviews, this week taking us to the hidden down-world of NYC. The Mortal Instruments is one of my favorite book series, and if you haven’t read any of the books I strongly recommend it, especially if you have a creature obsession like me. These books are full of demons, werewolves, shadow hunters, and vampires, with lots of great characters aside from the main two. So when I heard it was being made in to a movie my demon-loving self was shivering with anticipation.

This weekend I made it to the movies for the third time this summer to catch this flick eagerly expecting to be overwhelmed with action and mystery. Sadly it was not to be, and I am just glad that I used a discount deal to go see this movie otherwise I might have felt like I was being ripped off.

The movie does have some nice CGI animated creatures, and I will give them credit for making some horrifying, exorcist-esque demons that gave me the willies, but aside from these scary monsters the movie was quite a let down.

The Mortal Instruments is a series of books about Shadow hunters, people who have angel blood in their ancestry that spend their life being demon hunters. In addition, there are many species of “downworlders” like vampires, werewolves, warlocks, and fairies that inhabit this world unbeknownst to “mundanes”, their word for regular humans. The main plot of the novels follows this group of shadow hunters trying to track down and stop the main villain Valentine and his family’s world domination scheme book after book. In addition to this main storyline, there are quite a few spin-off stories following Clary’s unmatched talent to create new runes, the Shadow hunter society’s prejudice rules and boundaries, and Simon’s transformation in to a vampire.

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Ep 040 – An Interview With Matt Wilson

Happy podcast day Evil Geekites! Today we’re bringing you an interview with Matt Wilson, the writer and director behind the short film The Final Moments of Karl Brant, starring Paul Reubens and Janina Gavankar, which you can view in it’s entirety for FREE on the Nerdist YouTube Channel.  After the interview the Evil Geeks hang out for a while and that’s when things get kind of weird as they discuss the King of the Bronies, Smurf Head Necklace, and trolling Doctor Who cosplayers.

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Evil Geek Book Report – Daredevil: End of Days……Or is It?

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Alright guys, time for something completely out of my normal territory, but still just as awesome. I normally don’t do too may comic reviews, but for some reason, I have been obsessed with Daredevil: End of Days recently. Like to the point of constantly bombarding the other geeks with texts regarding and stating MAPONE!! Keep reading, and you’ll find out what Mapone is, but not all the way. So let’s get to this sumbitch right here, and lay down some good old fashioned judgment on something I love. Also, take some time out of your day to read some stuff from our newest poster Lillith. I have given her some duties in my departments, and she has been a machine as of late. I know you all love my posts, but don’t worry, I’ll be back to those very soon, and we have some sweet, sweet new stuff in the pipeline for you guys. Let’s just say that more than just villains exists, and there are things prowling the night that are not human, and come from your nightmares. That’s all I’ll say. For now though, let’s dive into the splendor that is Daredevil: End of Days.

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