The Weekly Skitter Report: Badlands

Howdy Evil Geeks, it’s time for our weekly break down of the extra terrestrial happenings on TV’s Falling Skies: The Weekly Skitter Report!  Last week we got ourselves reacquainted with the members of the 2nd Mass and their new-found allies from above, the Volm.  Tom Mason is now the president of the NEW United States and things in Charleston couldn’t be going better…until the human strike a massive blow against the invading Espheni, thus invoking the wrath of their other worldly foes.  Instead of retreating to lick their wounds, the Espheni are planning on unleashing a full-out assault on Charleston in response to the humans destroying their fuel supply.  It sure seems like Tom’s about to be the President of nothing more than a smoldering pile of ashes.

In advance of the massive attack, the human resistance is on high alert.  Charleston is being kept under increased security and armed guards are posted all over the city.  Matt Mason has been making the rounds to all the outposts, stealing whatever objects of value or practical importance he can find and bringing them to Pope and the Berserkers.  It certainly would appear that Matt is getting close with the group of thugs, perhaps in response to the neglect he’s surely facing, albeit unintentionally from his sole remaining parent: Tom.  Tom’s busy being all presidential these days and he’s been neglecting some of his domestic duties.  While Matt’s hanging around with Pope and Company, the group comes under sniper fire from unseen attackers and one of the Berserkers, Crazy Lee, ends up taking a bullet.  Fortunately for her the bullet just lodges itself into her D.I.Y. bulletproof armor (a vest made of snow tires), sparing her the pain of being shot.  Most unfortunately for her though, when she gets hit, she falls onto an exposed piece of re-bar, piercing her brain, not sparing her the pain of having a spike in your head.  She’s still alive, but she now has the most extreme piercing of all time, as the metal enters in the back of her skull and exits out the top. Eventually the forces of Charleston are able to repel the invasion and Pope manages to free Lee, who just wants nothing more than to be put out of her misery, and gets her some medical attention.  Sadly there isn’t much that can be done for Lee.  The re-bar is keeping her brain from oozing out of her skull, so any attempt to remove it will certainly kill her.  Eventually she expires and it seems that Matt takes her death pretty harshly.  The Berserkers have become something of a family to him, so losing one of them is bound to have a huge impact on him.


I mentioned earlier that Tom had been lax in taking care of some of his domestic responsibilities, one of those neglected duties being Anne, Tom’s baby momma.  Anne’s recently given birth to her and Tom’s daughter, Alexis.  Surely there isn’t a parent out there who wouldn’t love to have a prodigy for a child, but Alexis seems a little TOO advanced to Anne.  At only three weeks old, she’s already speaking, standing, and creepily staring at a 6th grade level.  Or is she???  Is Alexis some kind of mutant or perhaps an alien hybrid or is Anne just going crazy?  Anne decides to take some blood samples from her child, which is in no way a crazy thing to do.  Clearly it’s going to turn out that Alexis is more than meets the eye, but for right now Anne looks like a big, old nutball.  I always hate it when shows do this type of story line, because I feel like there’s too much story telling time wasted in setting up an ambiguous species of origin for the baby.  This storyline is TV 101, something strange happens and it’s witnessed by the person least likely to be believed.  They beg, they plead for someone, ANYONE to believe them only to be met with callous dismissal at every turn, ultimately to have it end up that they were right all along.  Suuuuuuurrrrre your baby’s an alien, Anne.   Of course we believe you.  In fact, I hear your baby talking to me right now!  Just cut to the chase and spare us this dance of characterization courtship. Expose that alien baby for the traitorous fiend she is!

So what about that gunfight at the beginning of the episode, you ask? Who was responsible for that mess?  Initially it was thought to have been caused by harnessed child slaves, but it’s revealed that the soldiers involved in the battle are actually members of the US Military, acting under orders from…Bum bum bum… the legitimate President of the United States and he’s none too happy with the residents of Charleston.  How dare they think of governing themselves while the absentee President’s been holed up in some military bunker for years!  The 2nd Mass manages to capture one of the enemy soldiers, but they are unable to get any valuable information out of her, since the only thing she will say is her name and rank.  Only after Col Weaver tells her that Tom’s President of the New US, dies she finally tell her captors about the other President.  You have to wonder what this will mean for Tom.  After being the leader for Charleston, will he be willing to live under someone else’s rule once again?  Does he tell his constituents about the other Prez at all?  He might be leader longer if he keeps his mouth shut, but is that the choice that’s best for Charleston?

The end of the episode finds Tom giving a speech on the anniversary of the Espheni invasion.  Some of the local people have pitched in to help create a metal sculpture deemed the Tree of Life.  Tom gives a rallying speech about how everyone matters equally and invites the crowd to write their dead loved ones names on leaves which will be hung on the tree sculpture.  Beautifully, the towns people begin affixing other mementos of their loved ones and a moment of spiritual healing is had by all…until that is the Espheni begin to attack during the ceremony.  Alien ships are bombing Charleston and in the ensuing carnage, baby Alexis looks up at the ships with a smile.  Seriously, that is one creepy kid.  The humans are being hit where it hurts and it looks like hard times are about to take hold in Charleston.  We’ve got the Espheni attacking, competing presidencies, general hell breaking loose everywhere, and the problem of the pesky mole feeding info to the aliens still hasn’t been solved .  Tough times like these will call for an equally tough president, for the good of humanity, let’s hope Tom Mason is up to the challenge.  Check back here next week for all the latest on the 2nd Mass in an all-new Weekly Skitter Report!

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About C-Mart

A true Marvel Zombie, die-hard George Romero fan, Star Wars addict, Whovian, and life-long gamer. I make with the Tweets @CMart0979

Posted on June 18, 2013, in Reviews, The Weekly Skitter Report, TV and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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