30 Days Hath Novembeard – Day 24

Sadly, Chewbacca’s chances of making the Hall of Fame were ruined when he tested positive for performance enhancing drugs. Will this blasted spice epidemic see no end?!?!

I think today’s Novembeard honoree needs no introduction whatsoever, but just in case you’ve been hiding from awesome stuff our entire life, I’m going to give him one anyway.  Today we are inducting a true legend in the field of non-scalp based follicular cultivation into the hallowed halls of Novembeard rememberance.  The one, the only, CHEWBACCA!  What a Wookiee!

There’s nothing worse than a Wookie with split ends.

He’s pretty much what you’d get if the Wolfman and a can of Propecia had a baby.  This beard is so mighty , that it could not be contained to only a face.  Chewie’s a full on, top to bottom fuzz factory. Not simply content with covering his face with a bushy Fu Manchu style mustache, Chewie maintains a full body coat of thick, lustrous shag that would make any 1970’s era carpet super jealous.  Think about what he must spend in an average year on 50 gallon drums of Mane N’ Tail?  Do you suppose if you broke into his room at night, you’d find him covered head to toe in hot rollers?  Not to mention, he’s a smuggler on the go, so he’s maintaing that full body ‘do in the depths of space, where your nearest salon could be over 12 parsecs away.

Not only does it look good, it’s a very utilitarian, yet stylish, outfit for all occaisons.  Whether he’s winning a medal at a ceremony on Yavin IV for riding in the passenger seat while Han saved Luke’s ass in the trench on the Death Star, or roughing it in the freezing wasteland of Hoth, he just throws on a nice bandolier and BAM – he’s properly dressed.  If you shaved him, you could probably make a really awesome sweater out of all that wool, that’s why we’re dedicating this cold Novembeard day to the man in the mohair pajamas.

He actually just built that snowman so he could practice ripping the arms off of things.

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About C-Mart

A true Marvel Zombie, die-hard George Romero fan, Star Wars addict, Whovian, and life-long gamer. I make with the Tweets @CMart0979

Posted on November 24, 2012, in Geekology, Novembeard and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

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