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Monthly Archives: September 2012

Saturday Morning Cartoons…Green with Envy!

Hello Boys and Girls of Nerd Nation!
Big Evil is back from his hiatus to nerd out for a few minutes talking about something dear to his heart…CARTOONS!
I’ve been a big fan of the toon genre ever since I was ‘Little Evil” growing up in one of the best decades for cartoons….the ’80s! Back in the day it was all stock animation, poor voiceover, and toy deals and it was AMAZING!

80’s Cartoons were so BADASS, Even Smurfs and Care Bears!

Although there was definitely a lot of cheesiness, the overall themes and stories were still awesome, in fact they were so great many of them have been re-made for this new generation of nerds. Today’s cartoons without question follow more of a serialized format than the ones that were around when I was a kiddo. The stories of today follow tighter plot points that carry from episode to episode, have some great characterization, and for the most part have some sick animation styles. OK, so you get it….I like cartoons. Guilty as charged!

Green Lantern The Animated Series
Green Lantern of comic-book (not movie….never, ever, movie) fame returns for its sophomore season this week. The first season without a doubt was pretty damn good when you see it as a whole, but it started kinda slow for some people so they were initially turned off. I’ve been a GL fan forever so I knew no matter what I was gonna put in the time and support this show and at the end of the day I was not disappointed! The show follows Hal Jordan around as he “Saves the Universe” in various ways, but more than that, it brings the GL mythos to the small screen in an interesting fashion. By the end of season 1, we were introduced to Green Lanterns, Red Lanterns, Star Sapphires, Blue Lanterns, and one of my favorites….MOGO! Also, the first signs of weakness to yellow are apparent and with no word on Sinestro, I bet he’ll make an appearance with his own corps some time this season.
The Bruce Timm-style animation in 3-D form was kinda weird at first, but it really grew on me in the end. This season opener did not disappoint. As I mentioned previously, todays animation is really big on following very large story arcs within the serialized format, so we started the show with none other than the Anti-Monitor in a brief sequence. As the show continues, Hal returns to earth from his time out in space to realize that theres another GL on his planet, none other than Guy Gardner! For the uninitiated, Guy was the 2nd Earth Green Lantern (not counting Alan Scott) who has always had a chip on his shoulder. A great character, who always thought that he was better than Hal, which doesn’t change here in the animated format. All I’m gonna say is that they do a great job at pulling off Guy and if you’re a fan, you really gotta watch it for yourself…

No, I will not make out with you!

In Brightest Day, in Darkest Night….This is an animated show done right!
Green Lantern the Animated Series airs on Cartoon Network on Saturdays at 10AM.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
September 29th brought with it the return of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. TMNT (or Ninja Turtles) is based off a comic book series from the mid-80’s that parodied X-Men’s new mutants, Daredevil’s Ninjas, and the Teen Titans (plus a few others.) It was transformed into a cartoon in the late ’80s with a massive toy line to boot. The Turtles were huge parts of pop culture for at least two decades but their last show fizzled out about 5 years back. In 2009 Nickelodeon got the rights from Mirage Comics to make a new show. As a young lad I was a huge TMNT fanboy (I had my cousin airbrush me a custom T-Shirt for their live action movie! That’s right I said airbrush….) and I can say that I was not disappointed in this resurrection. All of the important characters are there and so far have kept their personalities in tact. We’ve got Michelangelo (The Dude,) Donatello (The Brains,) Raphael (The Muscle,) and Leonardo (The Tool, er uh….The Leader…..c’mon Leo has always been too goody-good for me!) Master Splinter is still there filling the father-figure/sensei/Alfred role with regular dry humor as well. As far as supporting characters go, we still have Krangg and Shredder with his Foot Clan. April is a bit odd, she’s a teenage girl….Oh yeah, they made a point to mention that the turtles are only 15. The original never really touched on this, but these new guys are definitely less mature, but in a good way.

How will they drive the Turtle Van if they’re not old enough for a permit?

There’s a few other things like in the old episodes they just loved pizza and we accepted it, but in this first episode we see them try it for the first time and its a pretty fun bit to watch. I’m always a bit skeptical when “The Man” takes something that I really love and repackages it, but I am pretty optimistic of this show. I won’t lie, I’ve had the original song in my head for more than 24 hrs now and I really hope that we get to see Bebop and Rocksteady (two of my favorite henchmen ever,) but I’m afraid that they are owned by Fred Wolf Films who produced it in the 80s. I would put my money on Baxter Stockman and Casey Jones though. Sidenote. I watched TMNT with the new generation of geeks and they seemed to like it too! I guess you could say that I have some hope for these heroes in a half shell…..
Turtle Power! (What can I say, I’m nerdy and couldn’t resist…)
TMNT airs on Nickelodeon on Saturdays at 11AM, check it out!

OK, that’s all for now. Come back for more geeky toon reviews.
That’s NOT all Folks!

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Remember When Spider-Man Got Molested?

Pleading ignorance here, but I had no idea that this ever happened. I was showing a friend of mine lyrics to the song, “Spidey’s Curse” by the band The Black Lips:

Peter Parker’s life is so much darker than the book I read
‘Cause he was defenseless, so defenseless when he was a kid
It’s your body, no one’s body, but your’s anyways
So Peter Parker don’t let him mark ya, it’s so much darker
Don’t let him touch ya, he don’t have to stay!
Don’t fill a spider up with dread

Spidey’s got powers, he takes all of the cowards
And he kills them dead
But when he was younger, an elder among him messed him in the head
So Peter Parker don’t let him mark ya, it’s so much darker
Don’t let him touch ya, he don’t have to stay!

The teacher looked at everyone with a PSA
She saw that our hearts were gone
She saw that in everyone!

Peter Parker’s life is so much darker
Better tell Aunt May
‘Cause it’s your body, no one’s body, but your’s anyway

So Peter Parker don’t let him mark ya, it’s so much darker
Don’t let him touch ya, he don’t have to stay!
Don’t fill a spider up with dread
Don’t fill a spider up with dread
Don’t fill a spider up with dread

Admittedly, I never thought much about the lyrics. They always seemed to be just vague enough. My friend’s immediate response was: “It’s about Skip! There’s this one PSA where Spidey reveals he got molested” Of course after hearing that my brain just about shattered into a million pieces. He then showed me the actual panel where it happened and my life was changed forever.

Insanely enough, this is legitmate. In 1986, Marvel released a Power Pack comic designed to teach children about the dangers of sexual abuse, culminating in Peter Parker confessing to being molested at age 12 by this man:

An older high school student named Skip Westcott who apparently was turned on by Peter’s nerdiness and possibly his lack of parents. This traumatic event was never mentioned in regular continuity but it might give us some new insight to Spider-Man’s personality and all his wise cracks. He’s even more emotionally damaged than we thought.

The NYCC Comes Through For the Evil Geeks!

Good Afternoon all you Evil Geeks out there!  When we last left you yesterday we were a sad bunch of emo bitches as we were in the homestretch of the countdown to the con, but we were still waiting to get our tickets.  Much moping was had by all in the Evil Lair. :”'(

BUT, just as the funk of our downtrodden, unwashed, nerd bodies was about to become unbearable, we decided to shamble down to the old Evil Mailbox (naturally, with our untied bathrobes swinging in the breeze and our faces unshaven canvasses of moroseness) and lo and behold what do we find?

Yes, that is our Evil Stripey Bed Sheet in the background.

SALVATION AT LAST!!!!  The con passes have arrived!  Much apologies if we sounded down on the con yesterday, again it wasn’t our intention to sling crap at the people who put on the show, but to give you an inside look at the ups and downs of being a geek.  We all love geek culture and nerd life so much, that when our prospects for returning to “The Promised Land” of the New York Comic Con are threatened, we get a little distressed. We were hoping to get some press passes, in hopes that we’d be able to bring the rest of the Brotherhood some interviews and such from the Con, but it looks like we didn’t make the cut.  Sadly, it looks like the Evil Media will be grossly under-represented this year.  No worries, it’s all good.  We’ve always got hopes for next year!

I pity the foo’s who keeps these Evil Geeks from their Con!

So all is finally right here at the Brotherhood of Evil Geeks!  Once again this year we will be stalking the aisles and alleys of the Javitz Center, grabbing up all the free swag we can get our greasy hands on and hunting for uber-bargains and unique buys.  We’re in final prep mode for the show, tickets are booked for the con and for The Nerdist podcast on Friday night (of course we’ll have a review for you!), money is saved, and we’re picking out locations for Evil boozing opportunites in the city the weekend of the con.  We at the Brotherhood  certainly hope to see you there!  Maybe if you can find us, we just might have some Brotherhood of Evil Geeks swag of our own to give away of  this year (more to come!).

ALL HAIL THE RETURNING EVIL GEEKS!

Yes, Even Geeks Get Married

I know it may be hard to believe, but even the geekiest amongst us occasionally get married. What does that mean? A Dr. Who themed ceremony? Your wedding vows read by Stan Lee (Oh, true believer!) a Triforce shaped wedding cake? Well, yes please to all of the above. But now there is a new way to invite your friends and family to your wedding in style.

Geekvites specializes in Save The Dates to indulge in your inner nerd but are subtle enough to go undetected by the general population. For example, do you love video games? Is your reception going to be in the Vanilla Dome in Super Mario World? Well even if it isn’t,check this out.

What about Hyrule?

Obsessed with Back To The Future and going to NYC Comic Con to have Christopher Lloyd sign your Save The Date? (guilty as charged). Yea, they got that too:

So fellow geeks, unite! and let your family and friends know what they are getting into at Geekvites.

The Brotherhood of Evil Geeks’ Plans for World Domination Begin to Unfold

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! Actually, as far as world dominators go, you could do a lot worse than us. At least we have cool stuff!

HEEELLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOO Evil Geeks!  We just wanted to check in with all of our loyal followers and let you know that our plans for world domintion are now kicking into high gear.  We’ve officially expanded the roster and added another Evil Geek to our line-up!  Sure, it may only be a small step towards global conquest, but it’s an EVIL STEP!  Please welcome to the blog, our new contributor: Biff Tannen!

He is TOTALLY going to “Say ‘Hi’ to your Mom” for you. And do coke. Lots and lots of coke.

Thanks for joining our gang of Evil Geeks and we all look forward to your future posts!

HE WHO CONTROLS THE EVIL GEEKS, CONTROLS THE WORLD!!!

Yeah, No Seriously. Where the F%&# Are My Tickets?

Greetings Evil Geeks.  I wish I could report that all is well here on Asteroid G, but we’ve been simmering up a big ass batch of not well for the past few days.  We’re only two weeks away from the Nerd-pocalypse that is the New York Comic Con, but instead of rejoicing in the glow of the impending amazingness, we’re furiously pacing the halls of the Evil Geek Lair repeatedly asking ourselves one question: WHERE IN THE BLOODY FUCKING HELL ARE OUR TICKETS!!!!!

If you thought ol’ Brucie was pissed after the Illuminati accidentally killed his wife, just wait and see what happens if we end up missing the con. It’s actually going to be the Marvel crossover event next Summer: World War Evil Geek!

I realize that the con people are trying to manage a gargantuan amount of ticket orders, but give me a freaking break here!  I ordered these tickets back in June, specifically just to make sure that we were ensured access to the con.  I wanted this problem squared away, I wanted to not have to worry about it, it SHOULD be an afterthought right now, but here we are.  We’re two weeks away from the show and our Evil Ticket Vault is despairingly empty.  What the holy hell NYCC?  What’s the point of having people order so far in advance, but making us sweat it out on the ass end of the waiting period?  You certainly didn’t have a problem charging our credit card for those tickets, why don’t I have them in my hand by now?!?!

The Brotherhood of Evil Geeks Credit Card: Never leave the Evil Lair without it!

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to throw shade at the hardworking folks who bust their asses to assemble this amazing experience every year, but I’m starting to get a little concerned.  I wish I was able to say that this is the first time the Brotherhood has experienced Con Ticket Related Anxiety, but it isn’t.  Last year, if you had coughed up the extra 30 bones to get a ticket to the recording of “Jay & Silent Bob Get Old” with Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes, it was never really made clear to you that they weren’t going to mail you the actual tickets for the event, but instead you had to wait in line at the show and pick them up there.  After we were getting close to the show date and I still was without the tickets, I called their customer service department and was actually told that they were mailing the tickets to us soon, which was an outright lie.  I called them up again they day before the show and finally was told how it was all going down.  I’m worried I”m currently trapped in the middle of yet another customer service nightmare involving the con again.

I’m trying to stay positive until I know for sure that something is wrong, but signs are pointing to trouble.  Our Evil Geek Spies have reported that others have already received their tickets, so we’re officially upping our readiness alert to Defcon 4.  Prove me wrong NYCC.  Please prove me wrong.  Ok, anger vented, rage subsiding, urge to smash vanishing…   Oh look, the Green Lantern movie is on.  Anger rising, rage returning…

EVIL GEEKS SMASH!!! 

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